This weeks video store rental action movie getting the nostalgic treatment is Predator 2 from 1990
The first tagline I’ll give a pass to but hang on a minute for a film of this budget it’s got some real terrible taglines. Check 2 and 3! WOW!
Tagline 1 – “Silent. Invisible. Invincible. He’s in town with a few days to kill.”
Tagline 2 – “Pull over, park, and pray!” Seriously! really! someone came up with that??
Tagline 3 – “Lions! Tigers! Bears! Oh my!” Holy shit! I don’t know what to even say! Shocking!
Who’s our hero today?
What with Arnold Schwarzenegger suffering radiation burns and blast wounds after his rumble in the jungle. It falls to mega sweaty Danny Glover to step up against the trophy collecting big game alien hunter.
Had I seen this one on VHS back in the day?
Oh hell yes. The feeling of anticipation for Predator 2 to hit the video stores was way too much. Some how I had missed it at the cinema. I can’t fathom why? Probably just down to the fact I was spending the little money I had on partying and getting wasted! What ever it was, I was psyched when I finally got to see it hit the shelves at the local video rental store.
Quick plot run down.
With a fierce turf war being waged between two Colombian and Jamaican drug cartels throughout the streets of Los Angeles the LAPD try to enforce justice. With a heatwave beating down on the City, a hunter watches as the carnage and bodies mount up as a ferocious shootout spreads out across the streets. The Predator sees what he’s traveled here for! Worthy trophies to hunt and kill. His species have come before. Earth brings with it the chance of good sport. One man had stood strong once before, a man called Dutch. The heat brings more anger and rage. The perfect accompaniment to hunt his prey. They will be lambs to the slaughter but hopefully they will give him a fight?
Does the hero have a day job?
Bad ass super cop Lieutenant Mike Harrigan (Danny Glover) from the Los Angeles Police Department perspires his way through the City streets as the humid temperatures just keep rising to unbearable to levels.
Mike Harrigan – “OK pussyface, it’s your move.“
What’s our heroes special skills?
He brings to the table the Danny Glover special. The ability to talk and mutter to himself through any perilous situation the movie throws at him. Need a pep talk Mikey? Scared of heights? Need to climb a fallen drainpipe high across an open cavern? Need some encouraging words to chase down a relentless killing a machine? Well Danny’s monologue will help to motivate you through any situation.
Heroes weapon of choice?
As this is Los Angeles of the future, 1997, Mike has his Desert Eagle Mark VII sidearm retro fitted with a mini laser sight. In fact his three cop buddies on his team all have different sidearms featuring unusual laser sight add-on’s.
Heroes drink of choice?
Damn man it’s so darn hot our Mike Harrigan just wants anything wet and cold.
Does hero have a sidekick?
Lieutenant Mike Harrigan has a cool little team behind him. He’s got the afro-cuban latin jazz star and tough cop Danny Archuleta (Rubén Blades) on his right hand. On the left side he’s got the hot Latina firecracker Leona Cantrell (Maria Conchita Alonso) ready to crush balls with her bare hands. And flying his mouth off down the center stage is the wisecracking, joke telling Jerry Lambert (Bill Paxton) with a case of the squeezed nuts.
Jerry Lambert – “Okay everybody, just take a deep breath. Loosen your sphincters. We don’t need any rush hour Rambos here.“
Hot girl? Damsel in distress or ass kicker?
Maria Conchita Alonso is awesome as Leona the tough LAPD cop. She was Miss Venezuela and became a finalist in Miss World 1975. Been in many great movies with Extreme Prejudice (1987) and The Running Man (1987) being two top 80s ones I’ve reviewed. She still looking super sexy in her 60s but she may of got a case of LOCK DOWN fever? Check this bizarre wet fully clothed candlelit sensual bath singing video she posted up last month on YouTube HERE. Or even in the nude! Shabba!
Leona – (grabbing Jerry’s family jewels) “Try that cowboy shit with me fucker and you can kiss these goodbye.“
Who’s the main baddie?
He’s back! The Predator is back on the hunt. This time swapping the heat of the jungle for the melting pot of a city. This is another Predator. He’s jazzed up a little. He’s got more weapon’s, few more tribal tattoo’s and a slightly different helmet. One thing stay’s the same. He is still played by the 7 foot plus Kevin Peter Hall.
Baddies special skills?
Invisibility, heat and sound frequency scanner. A shoulder plasma cannon, wrist cannon, net gun, various death sticks, prongs and wrist blades. And if all else fails he got a small nuclear self destruct device as a big middle finger send off.
Psycho baddies rating out of ten? 10/10
All round death machine just read above to see how uneven that fight is.
Heroes balls of steel and anger ratings out of ten? 9/10
They maybe sweaty balls but Mike Harrigan’s hanging fruit are like cast iron wrecking balls.
Surely it features a training montage scene?
We get two little ones. Super cop Mike tooling up his weapons from the back of his squad car. Strapping guns and bulletproof plates to his chest. Then the Predator takes it one step further and shows off his trophy making skills. Using all his tools polishing up a nice new shiny skull for his front room mantelpiece.
Does it feature an impossible mission?
With the Predators weapons arsenal he brings to the fight the odds are massively stacked in his favour.
Does the hero get a chance to show off their muscles?
Don’t think he could of taken his shirt off if he tried. That was glued to him.
Will I be needing to pause the video player? AKA are there any boobies?
The proceedings start at 22.28 with an aerial shot through a penthouse window. See below for the more details on that scene. But not only do we get a pair of silicone valley’s but also a certain mammal Frank Drebin would be proud of.
What ever the Colombian drug lord had pumping through his veins I want some! What with his lady friend losing her complete mind in a frantic frenzy in his penthouse. She put Meg Ryan from Harry Met Sally to shame that’s for sure! Shame for the ecstatic lady when her orgasmic fun came to an end when The Wailers from hell bum rush the show!
Any good totally random surprise scenes?
With a Cadillac Fleetwood Limousine pulling up sporting a zebra skin covered roof with massive clouds of smoke arising from windows. “You want some ganja, man?“. Mike gets driven to the secret hide out of the Voodoo Jamaican drug lord King Willie (Calvin Lockhart). No idea why this big boss man would be hiding out in this cesspit of an alleyway. Filled with rats, rubbish and stench. Then for his soldiers to leave him there on his own some. “You can’t see the eyes of the demon, until him come callin.‘”
Films body count? Low/Medium/High?
It’s very brutal at times. Especially the scenes of hanging skinless bodies. What with gang member blowing each other away and the Mr Predator going on a hunting frenzy, the body count hits the top spot with a splat.
Best death scene?
The Predator’s fired razor wired net was a pretty crazy death scene but the award for best death is a spoiler alert!. In a dark wet and rat infested back alley King Willy meets Jah. I have to admit to thinking I remembered so much more of King Willy in the film. Felt sure he had a bigger role but no. Down comes the invisible city hunter. King Willy chants some babylon bloodclaat brimstone mantra’s as he screams with his head being carried away.
Explosion ratio? Low/Medium/High?
Cars, buildings and people blow up all over the shop.
How many stuntmen probably really died making this film?
There’s two that earn their money in the opening set piece of gun fighting chaos. Literally flying through an explosion ball of flames
Jerry – “So I go in for my physical and the doctor says “I need a semen, stool and urine sample.” I say Gee Doc I’m in a big hurry! Can I just leave my underwear?“
Any other familiar faces and actors pop up?
There’s lots to be honest but I’ll pick three.
Crazy Gary Busey is always a fun addition to any action film. Here he plays Special Agent Peter Keyes. Pretending to be a DEA agent tasked to bring down the drug lords. However in fact his special task force is trying to capture the Predator. Films from Gary Busey that have so far made it on my Wolfman Cult Film Blog are Lolly-Madonna XXX (1973), Soldier (1998) and Under Siege (1992) sure he will be making more appearances.
Adam Baldwin plays one of Busey’s right-hand men. He pops up all over the place. From Independence Day (1996) Full Metal Jacket (1987) and TV series Firefly, The X-Files and most recent The Last Ship.
Calvin Lockhart plays King Willie with big fake dreads and a big JA accent. Strangely I was sure he had a much larger role but I was wrong. He only has one key scene. It’s a pretty iconic Predator scene too. Calvin Lockhart appears in A Dandy In Aspic (1968), Cotton Comes To Harlem (1970), Let’s Do It Again (1975) and one I hope to review and watch again one day soon Leo The Last (1970). Plus I really want to see Melinda (1972)
Predator 2 was directed by Stephen Hopkins who had directed a few not so great films before like Dangerous Game (1988) A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream Child (1989) so I can imagine it was a massive task to take on this project. He did a pretty grand job. He would later make Blown Away (1994) and (I actually kind of liked it, yeah I know it’s a turkey) Lost in Space (1998).
The Predator was created by brothers Jim and John Thomas. They also wrote the screenplays for this and the original Arnie one.
Gary Busey’s character was going to be an option for Arnold Schwarzenegger to reprise his role as Dutch from the first film. But he declined the offer.
If it wasn’t for the gangs all being way over the top stereotypical characters then Predator 2 would score a low cheese rating. So in good faith I’m going to have to push the dial into the low medium position. Feel free to move meter to please your cheese needs.
IMDB score rating – 6.3/10
Wolfman ACTION & FUN rating – 9/10
Wolfman over all film rating – 7.5/10
Ok it’s not a patch on the roids and macho rage of the first Predator (1987). It does in my eyes hold itself up as a worthy sequel and at least it tries to be different. It was a nice touch to give Danny Glover the leading action role. It’s always hard to see past his Lethal Weapon character Roger Murtaugh but that’s no bad thing. Gary Busey is his usual bonkers but is toned down a few notch’s here. I wonder what the film would of been like with Arnie’s Dutch being involved. Surely his screen time would of been more than Busey’s and how would that of effected Danny Glover’s role? We will never know. This was probably my forth watch and I still very much enjoyed it.
PS Keep you eyes on that trophy cabinet. There’s the elongated skull of a xenomorph on the wall.
Feel free to let me know your thoughts on the film if you want. But most importantly have fun with the movies.
Keep it filmy…. Mikey Wolf.