Near Dark (1987) Aliens Crew Go Bloodsucking Berserk At The OK Corral

Near Dark (1987) dvd cover poster bill paxton burning mashed up

Ok ok okay! Hold the press. New headline! It’s a shocker. Sit down, please. You’ll never believe it. I don’t believe it. Not sure how it happened. I place the pointy hat of cult shame upon my head and walk out the door to ponder on life. This here Wolfman had never seen Near Dark before! I had always thought I had… I blooming hadn’t! Surely? If anyone asked I’d reply I had. There I was sat happily “rewatching” this cult classic when it dawns on me that “hang on a minute I don’t recall any of this!“. Looking for the positives. How amazing that I got to sit and watch this for the time. My shame turned to joy and the smile returned to my face.

Near Dark (1987) Adrian Pasdar Caleb Mae Jenny Wright love story

It was the moment I realised I was looking at a young Nathan Petrelli from Heroes in a cowboy hat that I knew I hadn’t seen it before. Or maybe you know him as Glenn Talbot from Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Yes it was him. Adrian Pasdar plays Caleb Colton a young buck, a rancher living with his little sister Sarah (Marcie Leeds) and their veterinarian Dad, Loy (Tim Thomerson). Caleb is a player. He knows all the girls. Until he’s confronted and transfixed with the blond stranger in town.  Mae (Jenny Wright) is different. An captivating drifter oozing mystery and sex appeal. Caleb wants to tap dat ass. He’s totally unaware that she’s wants to do the same. Well, tap that jugular. You see Mae is part of a demonic RV wagon of traveling trailer park psychotic deranged vampires.

Near Dark (1987) Lance Henriksen Jenette Goldstein Bill Paxton

I’d knew Bill Paxton was running riot in Near Dark as he’s on the cover all burnt up and crazy. Bill plays Severen. Actually in a more mega douchebag mode than Chet from Weird Science! Certainly more unhinged and demented. Well the whole bunch are murderous bloodsucking nomads. Lead by the charismatic elder Jesse Hooker (Lance Henriksen) and loved and followed by his beautiful, busty girlfriend Diamondback (Jenette Goldstein). ….. HEY hang on a minute! That’s three Aliens cast members together. Private Hudson How do I get out of this chickenshit outfit?“, android Bishop I may be synthetic, but I’m not stupid” and the big gun toting latina with the muscles “Anytime, anywhere, man!Private Vasquez.

Tagline – Blood is our life, Darkness, our feeding ground and sunlight, our eternal damnation.

Near Dark was made by the wonderful director Kathryn Bigelow. Known for The Hurt Locker, Zero Dark Thirty and my favourite of hers, the sci-fi thriller 1995s Strange Days. You see she was dating Aliens director James Cameron at the time (soon to marry). So I believe he recommended this trusted trio. I read that Corporal Hicks (Michael Biehn) “I say we take off, nuke the site from orbit.” was offered the part of Jesse Hooker but declined, opening the part for Lance.

Near Dark (1987) western cowboy vampire landscapes scenes

What we get to see within Near Dark is a hybrid of sorts. It’s a horror movie of vampires stuck in a western.  Kathryn Bigelow’s camera angles and shots of the landscape scenery are beautifully captured. Though we rarely see the Arizona desert filming landscape in the light. Haa living up to its name, it’s Near Dark at all times. Apart from the group desperately escaping the rising sun so not to burst into an inferno of flames and the need, thirst, for blood, the word vampire is never used.

Near Dark (1987) crazy bill paxton shotgun blood sunglasses bar

As a genre mixing story of midwest cowboys vs vampires it works surprisingly well. You get a Mad Max meets The Lost Boys with added True Grit. Stetsons, spurs and all. The midway saloon fight is a one sided massacre of horrific proportions. It insanely violent. Extremely graphic and very hard to watch. It just goes to show how deranged this group will go to feed. No one is safe. It’s all an initiation for poor Caleb as he’s still coming to terms after being turned. Still the human spirit and love for Mae and his family is just hanging on by a thread.

Tagline – At dawn they hide. At dark they wake. At night they search for blood…pray for daylight.

Can Caleb find his way back to his dad and sister? Can he keep them safe? Can they help him? Will he be able to escape the bloodsucking urge? Can he and Mae become more than murdering plasma guzzlers? Well you all knew many years ago but maybe there’s a few out there in the light of day that need to come into the Near Dark to watch it. Let me know your thoughts on this one if you wish.

A Few Things I learnt And A Few Things I knew

  • Writed by Kathryn Bigelow and Eric Red. Near Dark would be Kathryn’s first solo directing movie.
  • Co-writer Eric Red would also work on Bigalow’s action film with Jamie Lee Curtis called Blue Steel. He also wrote the story for the Rutger Hauer’s thriller The Hitcher.

Near Dark (1987) Jenette Goldstein busty diamondback sexy clevage

  • Private Vasquez I mean, Jenette Goldstein owns a bra company for the more buxom lady, Janette Bras.  Yep of course I had to go and have a look. The slogan – The Alphabet Starts at ‘D’. Darn it! I’m slowly getting to a C cup. One day I might be able to shop there!
  • Oh one more member of the crazy gang is the sweet innocent young Homer (Joshua John Miller)!! What am I saying he’s just as psychotic as the rest of the lunatics. Smoking like a trooper with an evil glint in his eye.
  • Tim Thomerson is a bit of a legend on the cult film screens. Check out Trancers (1984)
  • The brilliant electronic soundtrack is by those film score machines Tangerine Dream.
Near Dark (1987) amazing artwork poster
Incredible artwork

All in all I really enjoyed it. Especially spotting the Aliens crew. Though I did know Paxton and Henriksen were in it, I didn’t have a clue about Jenette, so that was a nice surprise. It’s fawled at times and the pacing is slow, especially at the beginning. But what a treat to see this cult classic for the first time and to be able add it to my blog.

Private Hudson –That’s it, man. Game over, man. Game over!

I’ll leave you with Diamondback Jenette Goldstein’s entertaining set stories.

Advertisements

Warning Sign (1985) A Predecessor To Resident Evil Or 28 Days Later? Rage Virus

Warning Sign (1985) poster virus mutant zombie infected rage horror film

By the end of his horrific day, County Sheriff Cal Morse (Sam Waterston) sat thinking to himself, maybe, just maybe, he’d rather be back in the murder and mayhem of The Killing Fields of Cambodia! Wiping sweat and blood from his brow he sank back into his chair. One thing for sure, he’d definitely prefer to be sat in his squad car eating Popeyes chicken.

Warning Sign (1985) Sheriff Cal Morse (Sam Waterston) popeyes famous chicken cop car jeep Continue reading “Warning Sign (1985) A Predecessor To Resident Evil Or 28 Days Later? Rage Virus”

Dark Angel (1990) Dolph Lundgren & Death By Compact Disc

Dark Angel (1990) Dolph Lundgren sci-fi action movie poster aliens cop

Dark Angel stars the most American looking I think I’ve ever seen Dolph Lundgren?  (Well Canadian I should add). With his perfectly coiffed dyed dark brown hair he somewhat, to me, looked like Nathan Fillion from Firefly. He wore a similar brown jacket too. Dolph didn’t seem to have much of his Swedish or, in the case of his famous Drago, a Russian accent either.

Dark Angel (1990) Dolph Lundgren looking like Nathan Fillion Continue reading “Dark Angel (1990) Dolph Lundgren & Death By Compact Disc”

The Adventures Of Buckaroo Banzai Across The 8th Dimension (1984) How The Blue Blazes Hadn’t I Seen This Before?

The Adventures Of Buckaroo Banzai Across The 8th Dimension (1984) movie poster artwork

First up please accept my deepest sincere apologies. Seriously how the blue blazes had I never seen The Adventures Of Buckaroo Banzai Across The 8th Dimension before I really have no clue! Yep that’s the title and yep it’s a wild ride. Big shout out going to the original card carrying Blue Blaze Irregulars member Todd over at Cinema Monolith. Thanks for giving me a gentle nudge with a tongue electrode.

The Adventures Of Buckaroo Banzai Across The 8th Dimension (1984) John Lithgow electrodes Continue reading “The Adventures Of Buckaroo Banzai Across The 8th Dimension (1984) How The Blue Blazes Hadn’t I Seen This Before?”

Paradise Alley (1978) Video Store Action Heroes 4 x Action Packed Fight VHS Movie Memories

Paradise Alley (1976) Sylvester Stallone Armand Assante vhs cover poster

So it’s that time again when the dreamboys or The Video Store Action Heroes as we sometimes go by join forces and unleash a choice selection of our movie rental memories. Now where this is of course a very fun excursion, its not without its dangers, yep I said it, dangers. It’s a tightrope that we walk to bring these reviews. Hacking into the hippocampus part of the brain has peril written all over it. Why you just don’t know what unearthly memory you could tap into. With a gentle prod a sweet memory might bring a bittersweet tear to fall down the side of your cheek or maybe release a slight giggle of laughter. Though truth be told it’s normally a spontaneous bout of Wilhelm Screams. Continue reading “Paradise Alley (1978) Video Store Action Heroes 4 x Action Packed Fight VHS Movie Memories”

Who’s Harry Crumb? (1989) When Fletch Is Outta Town John Candy Is On Call

Who's Harry Crumb (1989) John Candy comedy movie poster dvd bluray cinema

When you need a master of disguise detective and Fletch is on vacation, who you gonna call? Well private investigator Harry Crumb is next down on the list.

Taglines – Nerves of steel. Body of iron. Brain of stone.

Continue reading “Who’s Harry Crumb? (1989) When Fletch Is Outta Town John Candy Is On Call”

Forbidden World (1982) Sleazy Space Nooky And Hungry Mutant Monster Fun

Forbidden World (1982) alien cult film corman space movie poster

Bountiful boobies and softcore sex in space from the wonderful Roger Corman studios. Seriously what more could you want? Ok, ok, let’s throw in an Alien rip-off to add to the bonanza of mayhem. Get ready for a slice of sleazy science-fiction cult action fun and who really cares if it’s actually any good or not? Forbidden World is a sure-fire, it’s so bad it’s good space romp.

Tagline – The seed is planted… the nightmare grows

Continue reading “Forbidden World (1982) Sleazy Space Nooky And Hungry Mutant Monster Fun”

Deadlier Than the Male (1967) Crazy Hot Lady Assassins In Bond-Esque Caper

Deadlier Than the Male (1967) poster james bond style hot girl kickass for hire

If you are here for Deadlier Than the Male then you are more than likely here for one thing. So without no further ado here are the assassins and the other lovely ladies.

Deadlier Than the Male (1967) Elke Sommer Irma Eckman Sylva Koscina Penelope harpoon sea bikinis sexy Continue reading “Deadlier Than the Male (1967) Crazy Hot Lady Assassins In Bond-Esque Caper”

Enemy Mine (1985) The Defiant Ones Battle It Out Like Hell In The Pacific

enemy mine (1985) louis gossett jr dennis quaid sci-fi alien buddy poster cover movie

Science fiction often finds the ability to tackle prejudice and racial discrimination through the medium of film. Brother From Another Planet tackled many race and slavery issues, District 9 had the theme of apartheid running throughout. Racial segregation swapped to species segregation. Even the X-Men series touched on prejudice with the oppression of mutants. It runs through many story lines from film to television and on the whole is played out thoughtfully with a deep underlying message. One of my favourite genres that tackles racist behaviour has been with the classic buddy movie trope. Like Sidney Poitier and Tony Curtis battling it out in 1958s The Defiant Ones but lets flip it into space or something. Continue reading “Enemy Mine (1985) The Defiant Ones Battle It Out Like Hell In The Pacific”

Retroactive (1997) Blues Brothers Brother Baddie Belushi Battles Back In Time

retroactive (1997) kylie travis time travel jim belushi dvd cover poster

Wanted something pretty rubbish to add to my science fiction month of January. Something I hadn’t seen before. Retroactive popped up on a few lists. Umm what was I getting myself involved with? Well! Time travel on a dusty Texas dirt road with Jim Belushi looking more like Andrew Dice Clay. It’s a road movie with added murder, mayhem and a whole heap of bullets.

retroactive (1997) kylie travis karen time travel action movie Continue reading “Retroactive (1997) Blues Brothers Brother Baddie Belushi Battles Back In Time”